This article explores practices of ‘state-to-firm’ diplomacy as currently on display in the California Bay Area. Over the last ten years or so, an increasing number of governments have expanded the mandate of their consulates, sent additional staff, or opened entirely new offices to engage with the science, innovation, and commercial stakeholders in ‘Silicon Valley’, undeniably the original hub of global technology development. Theoretically, the article brings classical work on cross-sectoral ‘bargaining’ in conversation with new research on diplomatic practice and the ‘tech-diplomacy nexus’. Methodologically, it builds on ethnographic research in San Francisco and Palo Alto in 2024 and through ethnographic storytelling presents an experience near account of what it means to be doing science and tech diplomacy today.